Thursday, September 12, 2013

What If I Remain Single?






     My biggest fear is being alone.  It always has been.  I've never been afraid to stand out, to laugh at myself, or be the easy-to-get-along-with girl for anyone, but I've always be conscious of the fact that I'm single and no guys are interested.  Is there something wrong with me?  Am I too tomboyish?  Too sarcastic?  Too talkative?  Too much of anything?  Is there something about me that is keeping me back -- trapped in my darkest fear?

     I've always wondered if I changed something about myself that I would have someone love me, but so many people say, "Don't change yourself for ANYONE!"  And they're right.  Don't ever feel like you have to make yourself more of something in order to get that cute person of the opposite sex to like you -- be yourself and the right person will fall in love with you no matter what.  But, might I add to that above statement that you shouldn't change for anyone, except for God!  If He is working on an area in your life then change it!

     However, as girls, we always search for that security that a guy can give.  We long for finding that significant other and being cared for and protected.  But what if you're like me and single?  What if there isn't someone out there for you and you're doomed to be alone?!  These worries have plagued my mind many times and I still struggle with relying on God in this matter.  No bodies perfect. :)  But the Bible says that we should "cast all of our cares [worries] on Him because He cares for you" (1 Peter 5:7) and He has our whole lives planned out.  He has seen our future even before the beginning of time; He planned it out and orchestrated every last detail.  Wouldn't you think He had the very best in mind for us and who we were long before He created man?

Matthew 6:25-27 says, "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear.  Is not like more than food, and the body more than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air, they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you no much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?"

Worrying over something He has already ordained is not going to change it.  We just each must come to the point where we say "I'm willing" to whatever path He has chosen for us; whether single or married.  Besides, God has created us all different and many of those who are single are made that way because they have the capacity to love more than just one person.  So what if your singleness is just God trying to show you how much more you could love or do?  What if He is trying to show us His will for our lives?

For many, singleness is only for a season, but as long as you're in that season -- be ALL there!  Seek for the opportunities to minister in ways that you probably wouldn't be able to if you were married.  Go work with the children's ministry, support some little league games, jump in a ministry because you have the hours to fill it, ect.  Walk through the doors God is opening for you and don't focus on being alone.  Focus on the One who has always loved you. :)

Emily

Some interesting reads:
26, Unmarried, and Childless